Attention all you perfect mothers out there I need your help. I had to see this face above for about 30 minutes straight today and it wasn't fun. Wesley is almost two and with that comes a lot of tantrums, so I have heard. I'm looking for some advice on how to deal with them, today was his worst yet. So earlier today Wesley saw that I was drinking orange juice and he wanted some, I gave him a sip of mine right before I put him down for a nap. Well two hours later he woke up from that nap and wanted more orange juice, I refused to give some because if I do then he wont drink anything else. Well as you can see he didn't like that, so for the next 30 min he spent his time screaming, head butting me, hitting me, pouring the pretzels out of there container and then he proceeded to throw them at me. The picture was taken in mid pretzel throw. So obviously I put him in time out but that didn't work very well, all he did was scream and sign that he was sorry over and over again! So I'm looking for suggestions. Please I'm desperate. I have to stop him now before he gets worse!!!!
9 comments:
And you're going to bring him to my house?? Dream on!! LOL JK
Have you used time out? It works for Cade every time. Also when Cade is trying to get my attention by acting out I just leave the room and go in another and close the door until he quits. If you don't acknowledge him he doesn't get the reaction you are looking for and he will stop. But you have to be firm and consistant. Because if you do nothing he will think that is how he is supposed to react and he will get even worse.
Good Luck.
Well Candice- I am not at all a perfect mother but this is what my sister in law does. Anytime her daughter gets upset she tells her that it isn't okay to yell and scream but she tells her that she can hit a pillow as much as she wants and say I'm mad. I'm mad". She eventually stops and goes on her merry way. I haven't tried it but it might work. Good luck! After 5 kids I still haven't figured it out.
So I think Wesley and Henry must have taken some class together about how to "Help your parents learn patience" because this sounds remarkably like Henry only Henry can't get into things like pretzels yet so he bites and throws himself on the floor screaming. Let me know if you figure anything out that works!
ps-Johann was wondering what area of Riverside you guys are in and if you like it. His parents are looking for an investment and don't know much about areas outside of theirs. Thanks!
I am sorry you have to go through that Candace! I always ignored Vance when he threw fits. he has to see you ignoring him too. Turn the tv on or go to the computer and let him see you ignore him. I worked every time with Vance.
One word. Benadryl.
Just kidding.
Ange says no eye contact, no attention, no talking, no firmness or aggression or anger. Just be neutral. She deals with autistic kids with intense temper tantrums all the time.
Good luck!
-Mac
Aaron is funny! But one word that works is:
Persistence!
What ever you decide to do, you and Steven both have to do it every time. It may be time out, or ignoring him, or even compromise. Just stick to it and he will see who is boss! He is just testing his boundaries, they all do, you see Hannah push my buttons all the time! But just hold strong and show him your in charge.
Good luck. Oh and keep a very stern voice when talking to him when he is being disciplined.
I totally agree with everyone else! Whatever you decided to do---time outs, ignore it, punch a pillow, etc---you have to stick to it and be totally consistent. They're smart little buggers and if you give in once, they'll remember it forever!!!
Hey,
What Mac said, but time out. What I meant was no aggression or firm hand grip when you go to put him in time out. That way, he doesn't feast off your attention where it turns into a bigger issue. I don't know, it has worked for me!
I agree with all the comments except I wouldn't encourage hitting a pillow....with boys it's a little different as they get older it's common for them to have a bit more aggressive defenses. Learning to hit a pillow now may someday backfire and you'll have another problem to deal with. It's not that way with all boys but it's something to keep in mind.
Ignoring is good!! In fact I'd say the best thing you can do. My other advice is to use the time out but sometimes in the middle of a tantrum that can only make it worse...maybe try ignoring the tantrum, NOT giving in to what he wants then give him a time out for the tantrum behavior after he's a bit more "coherent"! =)
And my last tid bit...try bringing Jesus into it. He's at the age where primary is fun and he's learning the basics of Christ like behavior. I would always through in the "do you think Jesus or Heavenly Father would want you to behave like that?" and the "remember heavenly father is always watching you" when I gave him the after time out talk. It worked with Wyatt.
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